Now on to a more serious topic. This post comes at the heels of the latest development in NFL news. A Miami Dolphins player, Jonathan Martin, recently vacated his team and was placed on the non-football injury list. The man is seriously injured, but it isn't one that's physical. It's emotional and it's psychological. To put it bluntly, Martin was bullied by one Richie Incognito, his fellow Dolphin teammate known among his colleagues as the NFL's dirtiest player; a title he holds proudly. It was no surprise that he would be the primary individual to blame considering his threatening text directed at various members of the media.
What I find astonishing is the amount of comments and opinions among the everyman that Martin is "just a wuss crying to mommy and daddy because he got his feelings hurt." "He's 6'5" 300+ pounds and he's being bullied?" Well, yes, any person no matter the age and size can be bullied. It isn't about having feelings hurt but having someone harass you and go as far as to threaten your well being.
Take the situation out of the football locker room and place it in a business office. Would the recipient of abusive behavior still be considered a wuss who needs to put up with a little ribbing? While hazing does exist everywhere, there is a fine line where hazing becomes abuse. Imagine being on the receiving end of racial epithets and life-threatening verbiage. Would you accept that in the workplace? Of course not. A athletic team isn't any different. It's still a job.
Abusive behavior as bullying is not just an occurrence on the school yard or in the workplace. It can happen in all situations. I currently have a lingering bully which I had identified as a heifer. Now, I don't refer to her as heifer due to her physical appearance (a sow would fit best). It's because a bully comes from the term, bull; a male cow. A heifer is the female equivalent. This gal is a 20-something year old heifer. I'm 37 years of age. Is it quite possible for someone my age to be bullied? Of course. When you are on the receiving end of unwanted and inappropriate behavior that is a threat to your well being, it's an act of bullying. Over the past year I had:
- received a harassing, threatening email
- been "cyber-bullied"
- been stalked both online and around my home
- been threatened
- received unsolicited phone calls
- found slanderous postings on my vehicle and neighborhood
- learned of personal contacts who had been harassed by her
I usually just ignored her and go about my own business, but creeping around my house was the final straw. There comes a point where you just can't put up with the harassment and bullying. You have to say something. I did just that. I reported her to the authorities. I was told that I can take comfort in the fact that should anything happen to me, she would be person of interest #1 and only. Well it isn't very comforting since I shouldn't have to live knowing that a heifer is stalking your every move. But the report was enough to put a stop to her harassing, bullying behavior. I must say life has been going very well for me, and it keeps getting better.
Bullies have existed since the dawn of time, but it's long-term existence shouldn't be an excuse to allow it to continue. I'm glad that the Miami Dolphins report has come to light because it also highlights adult onset bullying and needs to be taken as seriously as those that take place in primary/secondary schools. Both society and authorities need to take issue with bullying because it's the only way to help those on the receiving end as well as put a stop to it.